Recognize what makes this moment difficult
Acknowledge the event directly without turning it into a lesson, comparison, prediction, or silver lining. For a message about how to support grief when no body was recovered, use this factual base: acknowledge the death and the relationship while repeating only facts the bereaved person has chosen to share.
Offer support that can be accepted
Offer one specific form of practical or emotional support and make clear that no immediate reply is needed. Offer specific practical presence, remember important dates, and let the person set the pace. Make the immediate next step clear enough that the recipient can answer without reconstructing the entire history.
Follow their pace rather than yours
Do not ask how it happened, assign blame, use stigmatizing language, or turn the death into a lesson. Use trauma-informed crisis, bereavement, emergency, or professional support when someone may be in immediate danger. The recipient decides whether they want conversation, ordinary company, practical help, professional support, or quiet.